Transitions

September 21: On the road for 7 weeks now, this trip has felt like a series of chapters unfolding in slow-motion.

I faced the first chapter alone, getting the bike organized in Heidelberg and spending just over a week in Alsace and central France. No matter how many times I do this, there is always something new to challenge me, something different to confront. One difference this year has been a determination to take the time to be in the moment. I have often felt the urge to “move on” and I still have to push myself to just rest quietly and take stock of the things around me (like this scene from Ornans). This obviously takes more time and attention, but I ask myself what I am rushing to accomplish that can’t be done tomorrow. Or the next day. I have the luxury of time.

The second chapter unfolded with the arrival of my cousin James on a rented BMW motorcycle. He too felt the need to take a relaxed approach to the tour, having had a hugely busy and complex few months in Toronto. We ride well together; his strengths fill my weaknesses, and vice versa. It soon became apparent that much of what we might have thought possible ( a trip to the Stelvio Pass for example ) was wildly optimistic, given this more relaxed pace. That said, we covered more than 1,500 km in France and Switzerland over 2 weeks.

I’ve now entered the third and final chapter of this adventure. My partner Kate arrived last week. We spent 3 days in Paris and then took the TGV to Valence, south of Lyon, where we picked up a rental car which we will have for almost 2 weeks.

I believe that travel amplifies personal behaviours. If, like me, you are naturally cautious, travel can make you anxious and apprehensive. Although I felt comfortable and relaxed while moving around, I have encountered some difficulty sleeping throughout the trip which I attribute to the stress of anticipating things that might occur and finding options to fix them. Kate jokingly ( I hope ) calls me a Border Collie – always herding and looking for the next problem, even where one might not exist. She too has traits that have become more apparent with the pressures of travel. But together we found this pretty view of  Eze le Village.

Just before leaving on this trip, Kate and I decided to live together in a townhouse unit at Garden Court. It felt then, and still feels now, like the right thing to do at this stage of our relationship. When I left, Kate stepped in and did much of the heavy lifting in terms of getting the move organized while I ate and drank my way through Europe. I owe her a lot for that. Now that we are together, travel has become a stress-test of sorts, for the more intimate relationship we will face when we go home.

As we make that transition together, there have been stressful moments, and there will be many more to come. That’s the adventure in any relationship. I think the fun part in all of this – the travel, the emerging relationship with Kate – is to be just outside my comfort zone, challenging myself to evolve my views and behaviours to become a better man.